Endlessly, She Said
by Arianator17
Summary: Love is something that I don't think anyone will ever fully understand. However, Cat definitely shows Jade what love really is.
1. Chapter 1: The Question Of Love

**A/N: So much has happened since I've sat at my computer to write fanfiction. I'm not sure if I'm happy with everything that's changed in my life, but it's just the way things go. Victorious is over... but that doesn't mean the character's stories are over. There's a million different things that could have happened to the victorious characters, and these fanfictions fill the emptiness of our curiosity, so that is why I continue to write. **

**Disclaimer: Well... the shows over. But my stories remain. I don't own Victorious...**

**Chapter 1 : The Question Of Love**

Love. What is it? Is it some feeling that goes away or changes rapidly like happiness or sadness? I don't believe this to be true. However, sitting here on my bed, in the dark, I begin to wonder whether it lasts forever or not. Maybe it's not the love that changes, but the person. I looked at Beck, who had fallen asleep. I love him. At least, I think I do. I don't even know anymore. It's probably past tense now. Loved instead of love.

Things between him and I haven't been the same since we had broken up before. We got back together, but we still ave the scars. I remember all the promises we made to each other. "Forever and Always..."

No matter how strong a bond is, you can never guarantee it will last. My hope for this love begins to fade more and more each day. Is there even a such thing as true love? Or is it just something we keep imagining to be true? Beck loves me. I know this. However, he wasn't the one who was torn into different directions. My thoughts began to overwhelm me. I needed to calm down...

I took my phone and walked to the bathroom. I flipped the light switch on, revealing the blue tile walls and the dark granite counter top with the mirror just above it. Before dialing the number in my phone, I looked in the mirror, trying to read my feelings through my face. Half the time, I don't even know what I'm feeling, but my face usually reveals my emotions. There's nothing there though. No signs of joy, depression, or even confusion. Just a blank, expressionless face.

I hit the call button on my phone and listen to the ringing, waiting to hear the click of the other person answering.

"Hello?" I finally heard after four rings.

"Hi Cat. It's Jade."

"I know silly, I have caller ID." I smiled. I looked at my face in the mirror while talking to her, and I could see happiness. "So, did you need something Jadey?"

"I just... wanted to talk to someone and you were the first person I thought of."

"Oh, I feel so special! What about Beck though?" She asked curiously.

"He's passed out on my bed." That probably sounded kind of suspicious...

"Oh... Umm... what were you guys doing?" She seemed uncomfortable.

"Nothing, we were watching a movie and he fell asleep."

"Oh, Okay!" Cat's joy returned in her voice. I didn't know why I had called Cat. I just wanted to feel something, and for some reason she gives me the emotions I need. I've been feeling so numb lately. Like my body just doesn't know what to feel anymore.

Cat and I talked for a long time. Then, suddenly, a groggy voice yelled, "Jade? What are you doing." The bathroom door opened, revealing a tired, handsome boy. His hair was messy, but still looked good. The tank top he was wearing was falling off and revealed his nipple on the side.

"I'm talking to Cat." I said casually.

"Oh... why?"

"I was bored and you were sleeping." I stated the obvious.

"Oh. Well I'm awake now..." I knew he wanted me to hang up to hang out with him.

"So?"

"So... hang up." He didn't even ask. He just told me too... that kind of pissed me off.

"Don't fucking tell me what to do." I said bluntly.

"Jeez Jade. This is exactly why we broke up before. I didn't mean it like that beautiful..." His voice softened and I saw a look in his eyes that I hadn't seen since we had gotten back together. It was love. I wish I could have returned the love to him, but I couldn't anymore. It just wasn't there anymore.

"I'm sorry... you're right." I calmed down and tried my best to show him that I cared.

"Hey Cat, I have to go. I'll talk to you later okay?" I said as I pulled the phone back to my ear.

"Okay, but ummm... what are you doing tomorrow night?" She asked before I could hang up.

"Umm... I may be with Beck. Why?"

"Oh nevermind. Bye." Before I could figure out why she asked what I was doing, she hung up.

Beck took me to my bed and began kissing me passionately. I tried to return it, but I couldn't focus because my mind was elsewhere... _Cat_, I kept thinking about how much I wish I could be kissing her instead. I quickly pulled away from Beck. He looked at me, hurt that I had stopped our make out session.

"Umm. I'm so sorry. I have a lot on my mind. Can we finish this later?" Beck sighed and stood up.

"Sure sweetheart. Call me if you want to talk." He kissed my forehead and left

Finally, I was alone. But maybe... being alone wasn't so good either.

My phone began to vibrate, and I grabbed it.

_Cat: Tomorrow night. My house? 7 o'clock?_

I thought about it. I would much rather be with Cat then hang out with Beck. I just don't know what I'm doing with Beck anymore. I feel as if I can't let him go, but maybe it's more the memories that I'm holding on to.

_Me : Sure!_

* * *

I pulled into Cat's driveway, nervous as hell. I don't understand why I was so nervous... Cat's just a really good friend and I had nothing to be nervous about. I'm sure we were just going to eat junk food and watch movies.

I walked to her door and began to knock, and she answered almost immediately.

"Come in!" She smiled and stepped out of the doorway so that I could enter. I looked at Cat as she closed the door. She looked stunning... she was wearing a short dress with pink flowers on it. Pink flowers are a little girly and childish for my taste, but she looked really good in it. I was surprised that her bright red hair didn't clash with it. I began to examine her tan legs when she tapped my shoulder.

"Huh?" I looked up at her.

"Um, I said you can put your stuff over there..." She pointed to a table in the living room. I walked over and set my keys and my phone on the table, and my bag next to it. I then looked around the room. I had never been to Cat's house before. Cat and I were somewhat friends, but we honestly don't really talk much. That's why I was kind of surprised when Cat asked to hang out. Usually people don't ask me to do things with them, because I'll admit, I can be very intimidating. I'm sure if it was anyone but Cat who asked me to hang out, I would have rejected them immediately. I don't know what it is about Cat... but she's so welcoming. Everything about her just seems to draw me in.

Cat's house was very small. She definitely doesn't have a very wealthy family, but she always seems so happy... I'm actually very curious about her. Everyone at school just sees her as the weird bipolar girl who lives in her own world and doesn't give a fuck about what other people think. I know there's more to her though...

Cat put a random movie in and sat on the couch. She looked over at me and patted the couch cushion next to her for me to come sit. I walked over and plopped down into the cushion.

"So, what are we watching?" I asked, hoping it wasn't some stupid cheesy movie.

"The Princess Bride! Have heard of it?" She started jumping with excitement as she told me the movie.

I smiled. "Have I seen it? Sweetheart, I've only seen it about a million times."

"Oh haha, well do you want to watch something else then?"

"No, this is fine." I smiled at her. She smiled back, and then turned her attention towards the TV. I kept my gaze on her instead of the movie though. She looked absolutely beautiful and mesmerizing...

Cat turned towards me, noticing me staring. "Whaty?"

"Oh... Uh." I snapped out of my trance, my face feeling hot. "It's just... you look beautiful, Cat." I smiled at her, charmingly.

She blushed and giggled, making my heart leap out of my chest. She looked at me and I couldn't help but to just look in her eyes. No matter how hard I tried to look away, I couldn't. Her eyes seem to hold so much in them and I couldn't tell what, but it was amazing. It was weird though, because it seemed like her eyes were getting closer and closer.

My eyes closed as our lips touched and moved together. I must say, she's making me feel something that Beck could never be capable of doing...

I think... I think I feel love.

**A/N: I know, it's starting out slow. I'm sorry! I promise it will get better and my characters will become more developed.**


	2. Chapter 2: The Answer To Love

**A/N: Thank you for the reviews on the previous chapter! I appreciate them so much. Sorry that this chapter is kind of short. I hope you enjoy it! XOXO**

**Disclaimer: Dan is a very talented man and his work is amazing. His work is not mine. **

**Chapter 2 : The Answer To Love**

"Oh my god! I am so sorry!" Cat yelped and pulled away from my lips. She jumped up and almost tripped over the coffee table behind her.

"Cat, calm down, it's okay." I said gently, but she was too busy freaking out. She grabbed my stuff in the corner of the room and threw it to me.

"You should just go. I... I made a mistake. I didn't mean to do that! I'm so sorry Jade! Ugh... Please don't tell Beck!" She was saying these words so fast, I could hardly understand her. She kept pushing me out the door and next thing I knew, the door was in my face. I stood there, dazed for a moment, but then grabbed my nose in pain. The door hit me when Cat slammed it. She's pretty strong for such a petite girl.

"Cat!" I yelled and knocked on the door. My stuff was on the ground next to my feet. "Can you at least be courteous and get me some ice for my nose?" The door opened immediately and Cat yelled, "Oh my gosh Jade! Did I hurt you?"

"Umm... yeah, just a little." I said, still covering my nose. Cat opened her door and let me back in. She took my hand and led me to the kitchen to get me an ice pack for my nose.

We sat upstairs in her room and sat in silence for a while. My nose became numb because of the cold ice pack, but I kept holding it there. Cat sat as far away from me as she could, trying not to make eye contact with me. "So..." I started. "You apologize for kissing me, but you don't apologize for almost breaking my nose?" I smiled at her to let her know I was joking, but she didn't seem to think it was funny.

"I'm sorry Jade." She sounded so sincere. Like she had done something absolutely horrible.

"Listen, Cat. You didn't have to apologize for kissing me."

"Yes I did. You're dating Beck and that was completely wrong of me!" She was so upset about kissing me, but I didn't understand why. I kissed her back...

"I don't even think Beck and I are going to work out, so that doesn't matter sweetheart." Cat looked up, surprised.

"What? But you two love each other!"

"Love?" I asked, more towards myself than to Cat. "I don't think it should be called love anymore. He's... changed."

Cat walked over and sat next to me. I thought she'd give me a hug or something, but she just sat there, looking down. "I'm sorry. I don't know much about love." Cat mumbled.

I smiled, and wrapped my arms around her. I didn't really know what I was doing, but it felt right. To have Cat in my arms, was the greatest feeling in the world. I put my lips next to her ear and began to whisper. "Love, that's the best feeling that someone can give you. You feel as if the whole world doesn't matter anymore because that love overpowers everything else around it. You can look into the other person's eyes, and just feel safe and comfortable knowing that they love you. And when they say the words -" I got softer "- I love you..." I felt her get tense, and then relax. "Every fiber in your body becomes completely devoted to them. You're in their control because your heart can't stop itself from loving them back with all that you have." My voice got darker. "But love doesn't last. Something always happens to mess it up. That person changes into something that you no longer love, but you continue to love because your heart is still devoted to that person. Then, everything you thought was good, suddenly turns the exact opposite. Your whole world falls apart and it takes a long time to build everything back up. That's how love works Cat. Don't fall in love..."

I stood up and began to walk out of her room, but before I went down stairs, I looked back at Cat one last time. She remained sitting on her bed, completely motionless. I could tell she was deep in thought. I walked down stairs and opened the door. Just before I stepped out, I whispered, "I love you, Cat." And then, I left.

**A/N: Review and tell me what you think please :) There is more to come...**


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